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What caused the Wizards' slump?

It's been a minute since the Washington Wizards were playing well. Why exactly?

By Kelly Cohen
Brad Barket/Getty Images

What's that quote - Life throws you curves, but you learn to swerve?

Well, the Washington Wizards are getting thrown everything under the sun ... And they are getting blinded. But what could have caused the team's latest slump besides not scoring more points than the opponent? I'm here to give you some answers, unranked.

Since I went on vacation abroad (Feb. 7), the Wizards are 3-7.

Since I got back from vacation abroad (Feb. 19), the Wizards are 1-6.

Since Bullets Forever talked about a "salty taste" in the Wizards' mouths, the Wizards are 7-15.

Since John Wall wished Rihanna a happy birthday, the Wizards are 1-6.

Since Marshawn Lynch didn't get the ball on the 1-yard line to win Super Bowl 49, the Wizards are 3-10.

Since Kevin Durant's second foot surgery (#KD2DC, yo), the Wizards are 1-5.

Since RG3 announced RG4, the Wizards are 1-6.

Since prom dates Garrett Temple and Candice Wiggins reunited, the Wizards are 3-12.

Since #KSLife started looking for a social media manager, the Wizards are 2-7.

Since Jeff Gordon rode a tricycle at the Wizards-Spurs game, the Wizards are 9-15.

Since we learned about coach Randy Wittman's tooting talents, the Wizards are 9-16.

Since Kendrick Lamar released "The Blacker The Berry" (which is hella good, by the way), the Wizards are 2-7.

Since Kris Humphries turned 30, the Wizards are 3-7.

Since the temperature randomly hit 68 degrees in the beginning of February in Washington, D.C., the Wizards are 2-7.

As noted by CSN Washington, since Marcin Gortat shaved his mohawk, the Wizards are 3-10.

I wish I could find a date and say, "Since _____ happened, the Wiz kids are 50-2!" Wouldn't that be nice? What needs to happen for the team to get back to a winning record?