You may remember back in November, Trevor Ariza released of series of Instagrams where he impersonated R.Kelly. It was a bit of a weird experience, but the Wizards were still clawing their way back up to .500 after a rough start to the season, so it was a welcome bit of relief. Since then, the image of Ariza's impression has stuck in mind, in much the same way that "Ignition (Remix)" has been stuck in my head for the last decade or so.
Inevitably, these two things were destined to collide with one another, just like "Trevor Ariza" and "4 years, $40 million" are probably going to collide with one another in a headline soon. So, with that in mind, crank up the music and enjoy:
Now I'm not trynna be rude
But hey I'm lookin' at some crews
The way they do the things they do
Reminds me of both of my coupes
That's why you're all up in my grill
Tryna get me to a hotel
But I'm just a football coach
The way that I am playin' da field
So don't gimme that, "Two, two"
I won't take that "Three, three"
Best believe I'll say no
Because I'm lookin' for fo'
While they sayin' on the radio
It's the remix to transition
The Ariza edition
CP3 rollin' that body
Like every free agent wishin'
All these offers, I'm numb
I'm like, gimme my chunk
It's a three day weekend
Baby, I'm about to have me some fun
Should I bounce, bounce, bounce
Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce
Bounce, bounce, bounce?
Negotiatin' a quote
To get me outta these clothes
Privacy is on the do'
But ya'll can hear me screamin' mo'
But I'm feelin' whatchu feelin'
I'm still hopin' and wishin'
Because I know I'm the key to
Your title ambitions
So don't gimme that, "Two, two"
I won't take that "Three, three"
Best believe I'll say no
'Cause I'm lookin' for fo'
While they sayin' on the radio
It's the remix to transition
The Ariza edition
Teams that ain't lookin' shoddy
Got this free agent wishin'
So many offers I'm numb
I'm like, gimme my chunk
It's a three day weekend
Baby, I'm about to have me some fun
Crystal poppin' in Wade's stretch Navigata
We got food everywhere as if the party was catered
I've got Chris Bosh to my left, LeBron on my right
We bring 'em all together I got thinkin' all night
'Cause after the dough it's the winner's party
And after the party I'd be two ring snobby
And after my fourth, I could clear the lobby
Then take it to my room and somebody
So don't gimme that, "Two, two"
I won't take that "Three, three"
Best believe I'll say no
'Cause I'm lookin' for fo'
While they sayin' on the radio
It's the remix to transition
The Ariza edition
Teams that ain't lookin' shoddy
Got this free agent wishin'
So many offers I'm numb
I'm like, gimme my chunk
It's a three day weekend
Baby, I'm about to have me some fun
Wiz I'm off in this Jeep foggin' your plans up
Cramp your cap space? Or try your Otto luck?
I'm still up and down, goin' round and round
To the remix I'm jus' thuggin' it out