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Why the Wizards-Pacers series might make Lady Gaga fans upset

Thanks to a scheduling conflict, there will be lots of Lady Gaga fans in the D.C. area rooting for someone to win the Wizards-Pacers series in five games or less.

Nick Laham

Saturday night, the NBA released the full schedule for the Pacers-Wizards series, including Games 5, 6 and 7 if needed. Everything seems fine with the schedule until you realize that Game 6 is the same day that Lady Gaga is scheduled to perform at the Verizon Center. As you would expect, Lady Gaga fans in the area are not pleased at the idea of possibly having the show postponed to accommodate a silly basketball game, especially since Lady Gaga had to cancel her last show at the Verizon Center due to a hip injury.

Certainly, emotions are running high on both sides. To settle things out a bit, we wanted to take a look at what a Lady Gaga concert and a Game 6 would mean to the area in a tale of the tape:

Ugliest outfit? WIZARDS. At least the meat dress was trying to make a point. The old gold alternate uniform was trying to be a good looking basketball uniform.
Who lives for the applause? GAGA. The Wiz have a better record on the road than they do at home this year.
Who has the better fanbase? GAGA. The Wizards' playoff run has revealed a lot about ourselves, and honestly, I'm not sure we are better off knowing how power-hungry we can become when we taste success.
Who has the best fan? WIZARDS. Nobody beats The Wizznutzz. Nobody.
Who is the better high-flyer? GAGA. John Wall was great in the dunk contest, but Lady Gaga has a flying dress for crying out loud.
More likely to sell out the Verizon Center? GAGA. The Wiz have gotten great support from the crowd in the playoffs, but Gaga could probably sell out two Verizon Centers, if we're being honest.
Who has been waiting longer? WIZARDS. Lady Gaga was still doing songs with Grandmaster Melle Mel the last time the Wizards were in the second round of the playoffs. She wasn't even alive the last time they won a second round playoff game.
Who throws a better party? WIZARDS. The GIF parties in the comments here trump anything Lady Gaga could ever pull.
Who is closer to the edge of glory? WIZARDS. Eastern Conference Finals count as glory, right?
Who is stuck in a bad romance? WIZARDS. Unless you're a bandwagon fan.
Who has the better P-P-P-Poker Face? WIZARDS. Just watch an Ernie Grunfeld press conference.
Who has the better W-W-W-Wittman Face? WIZARDS. Always and forever.
Who expresses themselves better? oh wait that was madonna nevermind

At the end of the day, I think both sides can agree that we're just glad this battle isn't over a Beyonce concert. No one has upset the The Beygency and lived to tell about it: