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Kevin Durant getting ready to announce new partnership

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We don't know exactly what this is about, but we have reason to believe it's about the Wizards. Please, allow us to explain. We already got you to click, so you might as well stick around and hear us out.

Geoff Burke-USA TODAY Sports

I'm going to give you a timeline of what transpired this afternoon and I'll let you draw your own conclusions on what's going on here.

Wednesday at 1:12 PM, I observed that this site had gone a full week without mentioning Kevin Durant in an article

If you've read us for any amount of time, you understand this is a big milestone.

Less than 30 minutes later, I sent out this tweet on my personal account, which I THOUGHT was a joke

CONFESSION: Yes, I live to make light of every single twist and turn in this bizarre saga, solely to exploit that small part of you that still clings to this hope for my own personal enjoyment and getting you to read about it. I am a monster.

But then, less than 17 minutes after that tweet, Kevin Durant posted this on Twitter

I can't make this stuff up. Those are the facts, people. Now you know.

Based on that information, we have a few ideas, what this new partnership could be about: