Magical Pixels, Wizards vs. Heat: Washington bullied by defending champs

Be honest. You knew this was coming. The Miami Heat don't lose two straight and then drop a home game to the Washington Wizards. Perhaps that's why the furor following Sunday's 103-93 loss was a bit muted compared to the postgame hysteria after the team's home opener.

Did this train wreck at least start out well?

Nene will not play vs MIA. Will have MRI on Mon to see what's wrong with left leg. Pain extends from calf to Achilles' tendon #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 3, 2013

#Wizards Starters: G- Wall, G- Beal, F- Ariza, F- Booker, C- Gortat #WizHeat

— Washington Wizards (@WashWizards) November 3, 2013

I don't expect Nene to play 30 games this season.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 3, 2013

Man..... #Wizards pic.twitter.com/VjXOy4OL4o

— Danny (@recordsANDradio) November 4, 2013

Nene has pain from the calf down to the Achilles tendon. I’m no doctor, but usually that means a bulging disc. http://t.co/Y95Gh9QxQK

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 3, 2013

Gah, if only doctors knew about Twitter.

#Wizards Nene having MRI Mon. Expect a close look at Plantaris & Achilles tendon given location of injury. Achilles injuries can be lengthy.

— Dr. Ray Solano (@DrRaySolano) November 3, 2013

Why is it doctors never have good news? Or if they do, it's soon followed by far worse bad news? Anyway, sounds like we're gonna have to go without Nene again for the third consecutive game.

Nene is listed as active. Doesn't mean he'll start but we'll see soon #WizardsTalk #NBA #WizvHeat

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 3, 2013

WHAT THE HELL stop toying with us!! This is too much to process during pregame.

Heat-Wiz pregame scene: Wizards rookie Glen Rice Jr walked out of the media dining room eating a bowl of ice cream.

— Tom Haberstroh (@tomhaberstroh) November 3, 2013

This will in no way lead to Twitter jokes.

#FREEGRJR MT "@tomhaberstroh: Heat-Wiz pregame scene: Glen Rice Jr walked out of the media dining room eating a bowl of ice cream."

— Umair Khan (@UKhanNBA) November 3, 2013

bench nutrition!! MT @tomhaberstroh: Heat-Wiz pregame scene: Glen Rice Jr walked out of the media dining room eating a bowl of ice cream.

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

Wizards diet, expect it. RT @tomhaberstroh: Wizards rookie Glen Rice Jr walked out of the media dining room eating a bowl of ice cream.

— Danny (@recordsANDradio) November 3, 2013

Heat-Wiz pregame scene: Jan Vesely walked out of the media dining room eating EVERYTHING. #BenchNutrition is a noun & a verb!!!

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

Heat-Wiz pregame scene: Nene walked out of the media dining room ... JUST KIDDING, HE CANT WALK!!!!

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

But I thought Nene was in the lineup?

Nene (calf) out tonight vs. Miami #WizHeat.... Live Chat underway: http://t.co/abHf8TFTu9

— Washington Wizards (@WashWizards) November 3, 2013

Anyone want to guess how many suits he owns? MT @JMichaelCSN Nene is in a suit. No way he's playing. The list is incorrect

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 3, 2013

WHICH IS IT FUNNY MAN?!?!?

Active list is authorized by a head/asst coach and theyre required to circle the active players. Nene's name was circled #WizardsTalk #NBA

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 3, 2013

Not sure if Wittman was using shenanigans here or if again he thot Nene would be active and then it was an 11th hr change #WizardsTalk #NBA

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 3, 2013

@tjackson85 That's correct. That's what Wittman told all of us. But he also thought he had Nene and then Nene backed out.

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 3, 2013

#Nenegate #SoWizards

Has the game started yet?

Wiz start the game off running the loop which results in a Gortat make from 6 feet out.

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 3, 2013

Wiz have been very good executing their Loop play this year, for what it’s worth.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 3, 2013

Promising...

...and then follow it up breaking the record for most jumps in one defensive possession

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 3, 2013

Better grab a beer.

Gortat got clobbered. No call, of course.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 3, 2013

Buckhantz "He just got la-sued" what? you mean lassoed?

— Chris Ford (@DCSportsNexus) November 3, 2013

Gortat needs more musk. Getting no respect from Heat or refs.

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 3, 2013

This surprises everyone. #noitdoesn't

Nothing you can do about those three LeBron threes.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 3, 2013

^ This is a finalist for our "Things you did not hear three years ago" contest.

#Heat lead 33-27 after 1st. 65% shooting. 5 made 3s. #WizardsTalk #NBA

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 3, 2013

Not bad being down 6 after that offensive performance by Miami, except that the same players who kept up also (didn't) play defense.

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 3, 2013

what do u mean? we see Jan high-fiving air. RT @dcsportsbog: wzzntzz see? Besties pic.twitter.com/aho8AMev5Y

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

Could be worse. At least the end of the bench is sticking together.

Seraphin looked to pass out of the high post immediately. Unfortunately, he looked towards the wrong guy.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 3, 2013

Al Harrington had a sweat lob pass to Kevin Seraphin for alley-oop. But otherwise, not the best unit for ball movement out here #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 3, 2013

Wizards currently colluding to only allow two players to move at all during offensive possessions. Spoiler alert: shit is not going well.

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 3, 2013

Kevin Seraphin will redefine verticality.

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 3, 2013

Seraphin knew he was about to get a rebound so...ZUT ALORS, JE NE TOUCHE PAS CE BALLON.

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 3, 2013

Don't tease us, Kev. We can't take it. Better switch our focus to the actual future of the franchise.

Beal’s thinking too much. Had an easy pass to Gortat on that pick and roll. Didn’t make it.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 3, 2013

What is Brad Beal doing? Looks very tentative again.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 3, 2013

Bradley Beal on Chris Bosh down low. Marcin Gortat on LeBron James out top. Mismatches all around. Beal quickly fouls Bosh #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

Beal scared shitless again? #whitmanface

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

Is there any light at the end of this tunnel (so I can stretch this train wreck metaphor ever further)?

Rashard Lewis hits the three. This game has officially been ruled a disaster

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 3, 2013

Welp, that's our cue to turn off the television. Thanks for tuning in guys, it's been a blast...

Heat beatin the Wiz so handily Chris Bosh writing Fortran on the floor

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Heat beatin Wiz so handily Chris Bosh developed a Java app in transition

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Heat beatin Wiz so handily Chris Bosh just jailbreaked Martell Webster's phone

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Ask Bosh, he wrote the code RT @BulletsForever: Quick: someone look up the cheat codes LeBron has on

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Heat beatin the Wiz so handily Chris Bosh inserted malicious code in G-Wiz's pacemaker

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Heat beatin the Wiz so handily Chris Bosh flying to Wheaton during halftime to fix Garbot

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Nope, can't leave after that. Glorious. I've caught a second wind.

#WALLTHREE

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

John Wall 3 ball answered by Dwyane Wade dunk. #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

John Wall threes are the best threes.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

I agree.

Gortat!

— The Nats Blog (@TheNatsBlog) November 4, 2013

Gortat hits a 3 at the buzzer, but the #Wizards trail the #Heat 61-48 at the half. #WizardsTalk

— CSN Washington (@CSNwashington) November 4, 2013

Nick Foles may have thrown 7 TD's tonight, but Marcin Gortart just hit a three at the buzzer

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

Marcin Gortat lifted his arms, flashing 3 fingers on both hands, & smiled after drilling his 3rd career 3-pointer. He's now 3-14 #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

I take that back. Gortat threes are the best kind of threes.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

I stand corrected. More importantly, looks the Wiz might actually have a chance at the upset, no?

Wittman, Randy! #Wizards pic.twitter.com/ludiQD3c7L

— Danny (@recordsANDradio) November 4, 2013

Oh no. We all know what the face means.

. #Heat not playing well to start the 3rd. But neither are Wizards. Have a chance to capitalize. Matching bad offense #WizardsTalk #NBA

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 4, 2013

Beautiful behind-the-back pass from John Wall to..... Mario Chalmers.

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

MIA has 16 pts off 15 #wizards turnovers. WAS trails by 15. Go figure.

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

No starter is in double figures yet for Wiz. #Heat have 3. #WizardsTalk #NBA #WizHeat

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 4, 2013

Trevor Booker airball hook. Trevor Ariza airball layup, missed layup & missed dunk. #wizards-MIA game summed up in 1 possession.

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

Free Al Harrington.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

Trevor Booker is heading to the Wizards locker room. Al Harrington checking in..

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

Trevor Booker is hurt. *pretends to be surprised*

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

AAAAAAHHHH GET TREVOR BOOKER’S JAMMED FINGER OFF MY SCREEN

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

Love Ariza, #SoAriza. #Wizards https://t.co/akeKlY3Oj9

— Kyle Weidie (@Truth_About_It) November 4, 2013

Another unbalanced step back from Al Harrington. No more cheddar for you sir

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

Harrington is Jordan Crawfording the Wizards right now.

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 4, 2013

Random but irreverent & irrelevant statement: John Wall's facial hair must connect before the #Wizards can compete.

— Kyle Weidie (@Truth_About_It) November 4, 2013

This raises a crucial but oft-neglected point: The lack of facial hair-related NBA analytics is a crime. It is up to the internet to correct this. Interlude over.

Goddammit how do you have that basic of a defensive breakdown in transition???

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

Game, set, match. Wizards fall to 0-3 before the end of the third quarter.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

Ariza is a sub-.300 shooter on 3-pointers above the break. He takes a lot of them. It's dumb. #wizards

— HELLO my name is (@JohnCTownsend) November 4, 2013

Yeah, I don't think you need both Wall and Gortat rushing out on a shooter in the elbow, leaving Chalmers open in the corner.

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

Really seems like the Wizards have changed their scheme. Dropped back on p&rs last year, hard hedging this year. Not sure why the change

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

The Heat have assisted 25 of 29 field goals tonight.

— Tom Haberstroh (@tomhaberstroh) November 4, 2013

#Heat extend lead to 18 over #Wizards. 77-59 w/ 3:29 left in 3rd. Beal has 15, Wall w/ 11p, 7a #WizHeat

— Washington Wizards (@WashWizards) November 4, 2013

Al is WIDE open above the break, but decides to step in for a long two. Why?

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

Wiz exist to harsh ur buzz

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Ariza is 0-for-7. Harrington, who has had some really good open looks, is 0-for-6 #WizardsTalk #NBA #WizHeat

— J. Michael (@JMichaelCSN) November 4, 2013

Firing Wittman, which national media is yearning to do, won't solve any of Wiz issues

— Adam McGinnis (@adammcginnis) November 4, 2013

Scheme was good last year. This just adds to confusion RT @ChristyWScott51: @MikePradaSBN want more traps, but not getting there in time...

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

Trevor Booker nailed it when he said, "We can't just talk about it, we've got to be about it … we haven’t been about it." #wizards

— HELLO my name is (@JohnCTownsend) November 4, 2013

You have Christmas next week? RT @itsakram: @HPbasketball You think Randy Whittman lasts until Christmas?

— Hardwood Paroxysm (@HPbasketball) November 4, 2013

Anyone who follows Wiz losing debacle closely knows what change needs to transpire, powers to be have fatefully disagreed

— Adam McGinnis (@adammcginnis) November 4, 2013

http://t.co/92NgIvDUuX RT @dc_fusion: Trevor Ariza: 0/8 fg, 0/3 downtown

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Birdman, Birdman! was setting a moving screen to free Shane Battier & Trevor Ariza picked up a flagrant foul for tossing him aside #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

Trevor Ariza was trying to throw Birdman out of the nest so that he could fly. Sorry.

— Jack Kogod (@Unsilent) November 4, 2013

"GTFO" via The Human Hookah, Trevor Ariza. https://t.co/6T2Vhi8aOS

— Conor Dirks (@ConorDDirks) November 4, 2013

Are you sure you don't mean a Mike Brown timeline? RT "@wzzntzz: randy whitman onna flip saunders timeline"

— DavidDunn (@ImDavidDunn) November 4, 2013

Miami has 28 assists tonight. Wizards have just 15.

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

MIA closes 3rdQ on 15-5 run & take 87-64 lead. #wizards 12 mins from 3rd straight 0-3 start

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

TOP 12 PROECTED!!!!!! #WizardsAgainstTheWorld

— Andrew Sharp (@andrewsharp) November 4, 2013

"Don't worry, be happy."-Wizards management. RT"@_ThatGuyCorey: Gonna go cry in a corner"

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

can sumbody get randy a "massage" tonight? he gone hav so much rage, gotta get the poison out

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

So.... at one point do we change our twitter avatar to this? pic.twitter.com/pqKorklwLF

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

"Long Live #WittmanFace." -Sincerely, Internets https://t.co/FU8RyCf8Ix

— Kyle Weidie (@Truth_About_It) November 4, 2013

Phil Chenier's reaction to the game: "Watching this it's hard to believe that [the Heat] had that two-game losing streak." #soWizards

— HELLO my name is (@JohnCTownsend) November 4, 2013

I get the feeling that Jan Vesely & Glen Rice Jr. will have a chance to make their season debuts in this one, no? #wizards

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

Yep, this seems like a good place to finally stop. Goodnight, everybody.

Trevor Ariza hits back2back 3s & #wizards have cut 23-point deficit down to 11 with 7:12 left. Looks like Jan & GRJr will continue to sit

— Michael Lee (@MrMichaelLee) November 4, 2013

All of a sudden it's an 11-point game. @TrevorAriza has caught fire here in 4th Q, He's hit 3 triples & and 13 for game, 7:12 left #WizHeat

— Washington Wizards (@WashWizards) November 4, 2013

Ariza shot 47% from the corners last season. Hit two corner 3s right there. See the difference? #wizards

— HELLO my name is (@JohnCTownsend) November 4, 2013

16-4 run for the @WashWizards ....i'm grasping!

— John Auville (@moneymetalcakes) November 4, 2013

Its a damn shame moral victories aren't placed in the 'w' column.

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

Damnit. Leave me be. We all know how this ends...

Chris Bosh is so good.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

Someone send Chris Bosh back to Eagleton

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

I'm in a wonderful mood because the Redskins won. Just casually pointing out that the Wizards will be 0-3 for a 3rd straight year. #HotStart

— danny rouhier (@funnydanny) November 4, 2013

moral ambiguity in Camus' "The Stranger" > moral victories in Wizards basketball

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 4, 2013

Until Nene comes back, I like small ball, Gortat, Ariza, Webster, Beal, Wall @WashWizards #wizheat

— Glenn Consor (@GCtalks) November 4, 2013

"Give the Wizards credit for battling back here" Steve Buckhantz is all in for moral victories

— Bullets Forever (@BulletsForever) November 4, 2013

I thought "playoff teams" didn't have moral victories

— McCarrick (@McCarrick) November 4, 2013

Wizards would be in good shape if NBA games were 50 minutes long.

— Mike Prada (@MikePradaSBN) November 4, 2013

Nobody gets quite as excited about about a 7 point deficit with under a minute as Buckhantz

— Chris Ford (@DCSportsNexus) November 4, 2013

I look forward to Ernie's impassioned reading of TS Eliot's "The Wasteland" later this evening

— McCarrick (@McCarrick) November 4, 2013

I wasn't able to make it to that. I'm sure it was riveting.

Looking on the bright side, hopefully the Wiz win their next game. I'll bet they're playing some patsy.

Hey at least the #Wizards play the Sixers next game, right? *Sixers are undefeated* Oh, never mind...

— Ben M (@BenAgent0) November 4, 2013

C'mon now, internet, give me something to smile about.

"He missed the defensive assignment." "No, he did." [shared laffter] RT @ConorDDirks: Machosensuous. #FashionWolf pic.twitter.com/7hexicTnoJ

— wizznutzz (@wzzntzz) November 3, 2013

Yeessss. Told you guys Airwolf is the best fit alongside the Polish Hammer.

As always, check out our Storystream for coverage of Wiz-Heat, and here's some more recaps: [WaPo | AP | CSN Washington | District Sports Page | Wiz of Awes | Hoop District | Wizards.com | Hot Hot Hoops | Miami Herald | Sun Sentinel (gamer, column) | Miami New Times | All U Can Heat]

Here's links to game highlights, as well as postgame interviews with Randy Wittman, John Wall and Bradley Beal.

More from Bullets Forever:

• Wizards vs. Heat final score: No moral victory in listless 103-93 loss to defending champs
• Wizards vs. Heat: Defense struggles again in 103-93 loss
• Wizards vs. Heat preview: Battle of two teams already beaten by the 76ers
• John Wall injury update: Wizards' PG will play vs. Heat
• John Wall injury: Wizards' G sat out practice with back spasms, questionable for Sunday