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Bullet Points: Dan Gilbert Has Last Laugh (In Comic Sans) While Fake Season Saves Lives

Here's a weekend edition of Bullet Points to help get you through your days off. Feel free to use it as an off-topic thread while we wait to find out if there will be a season. Come on, Schwartz...

It's an illusion! November 9th, the players are willing to accept a 50-50 BRI split in exchange for some help on systems issues. Hallelujah! Buuuut on October 20th, they were refusing to come down to a 50-50 BRI split without full resolution on system issues. Of course, it was Dan Gilbert telling the NBPA 'Trust me'. Three weeks of lockout negotiations to end up exactly where we were three weeks ago? I know there has been movement on some of those system issues...but if you had told me that Dan Gilbert would have the last laugh, I would have expected you to say it in Comic Sans.

You tell me you're a super-mega-ultra lightning babe? That's all right with me. I'm good...I'm good. Lockout burnout strikes the hardcore masses and it's getting harder and harder to attach any significance to the updates out of New York. 'No, now we're really, really serious and there's a chance we could possibly-cancel-the-whole-season-or-maybe-have-75-games-we'll-see.' Fans are approaching the point where they're ready to say 'call me when it's over.'

Suspense is worse than disappointment. Thank baby Jeebus for the fake season. My actual baby has been sick (fever blisters...nerve-wracking) so I've been off the grid for a while...but knowing that games are not not (not) happening is an odd source of comfort. Peanut butter and pickle sandwiches for the NBA fan's soul.

YouTube Myspace and I'll Google your Yahoo! The league is rumored to cancel the season if no accord can be reached, the players are rumored to petition their leadership to decertify...the process and consequences of Scenario A are fairly obvious. Scenario B is going to require explication from guys like Howard Beck and Tom Ziller to gain a full appreciation of whether or not it's even possible. Until then, like the man said, 'It would be bad.'

Don't even think about playing yourself into shape. (1) It's never a good idea...we've seen where that road leads and it doesn't go anywhere until the team is eliminated from playoff contention. (2) A compressed season means little recovery time between court times. Which means your body better be tuned and humming like a concert violinist's you-know-what. Addressing players head-on is definitely a faux pas...but in case any of them are reading this and thinking about it...BAD LLAMA!